Have you ever been involved in a relationship where you felt attacked with seemingly innocent attitudes ? Or do you feel that someone close to you uses this attitude to get what they want? Read on and find out more about this attitude.
What is passive aggressive attitude?
The passive aggressive attitude can take many forms, although they are all non-verbal aggression or negative behavior. It usually occurs when we are angry, sad or disappointed with someone to whom we cannot or want to show our true feelings. It is a form of emotional abuse because it causes great emotional pain and damage to the people we love.
Identify the passive aggressive attitude
Passive aggressive aggression occurs when certain negative behaviors persist in any type of relationship. Among the attitudes that can be presented are the following:
– Lack of communication when it is clear that there is a problem situation that must be discussed.
– Avoid or ignore the person with whom you cannot speak calmly.
– Avoid problems, issues and situations that must be discussed or concluded.
– Give priority to minor issues and leave the most important ones for later.
-Obstruct or sabotage events or processes that generate changes for their benefit.
-Avoid situations in which you could lose or find someone to compete with
– Be ambiguous and unclear in conversations with others.
-Maintain an attitude of bad humor, silence and resentment with the intention of attracting attention and generating sympathy.
– Fear of maintaining close relationships.
– Excuses or reasons for not doing things, without taking responsibility for it.
– Victimization and inability to see their share of responsibility for problems.
– Depending on the person and the situation, all or some of these characteristics may be present.
Where does the passive aggressive attitude come from?
The passive aggressive attitude is a defense mechanism with which it is intended to achieve emotional protection. It is an automatic attitude that derives from past negative experiences that have damaged the person who expresses them in the deepest part of their being. The basis of this attitude are fears, grudges, disappointments, insecurities and low self-esteem.
Learn to deal with passive aggressive attitude
If you are a passive-aggressive person and you want to change, you must begin by understanding its causes. When you do this, it will be easier for you to stop before starting this attitude, but if you fall into it you will have to take responsibility for your actions and reactions. You should also avoid feeling attacked when facing your problems, instead keep an objective view.
If you are the one who must deal with a passive aggressive person, try to understand the reasons for this attitude and explain to the other person how it is affecting you. You must prepare to receive aggression, without allowing yourself to fall victim to guilt. Instead, try to be honest about your share of responsibility in the situation and if the situation continues, set clear boundaries.