There is nothing like leaving behind the “you can’t”, “you don’t know” , “you don’t deserve”. Because reaching where others said you would not do it is not only a personal triumph: it is an act of justice before retrograde minds, before those who were never able to see us with authenticity, respect and closeness.
Something we all know is that we live in a society subject to comparison, and especially to an educational system that “labels” us early. In the classrooms, the so-called “bad students” inhabit those last rows about whom it is prophesied, with more or less dissimulation, that “they will never get anywhere . ” Because the child who stays at “4” is simply not fit for success.
“I have always liked to learn. What I don’t like is being taught “
The education, today, is becoming in many cases a traumatic event. We have good professionals, but the system and the means do not accompany. This homogeneous, crowded and insensitive approach to the needs of children gives a real step to self-fulfilling prophecies. If you failed in school, you will fail in life.
However, another even more problematic dimension is added to the educational dimension: the family one. Sometimes growing up in an unflattering, discriminatory or sexist environment implies that we are inoculated with a poisoned defeatism from which it is very difficult to defend ourselves.
We suggest you reflect on these aspects.
When reaching something means breaking with everything
Sometimes the process of getting somewhere involves, in effect, having to break away from everything. The structural rebellion is undoubtedly accompanied by an internal revolution that not everyone is capable of making. It is necessary to demolish educational models, instilled family values and those limiting thought patterns that for a time cornered us in our spaces of unhappiness.
As we say, it is not exactly an easy process, especially for women. We cannot forget, for example, that today, in this era of progress, many women see their aspirations vetoed by the weight of those patriarchal mechanisms that continue to prevail in many families.
In the interesting book “Resilience and Triumph: Immigrant Women Tell Their Stories” we are explained the hard process that many Indian, Arab or Mexican immigrants go through when arriving in other countries. These women are an example of daily struggle in the face of adversity. On the one hand, they must struggle to find their way with their families in a new society. However, there is another silent, dark and delicate struggle that is rarely talked about.
We refer to those confrontations that take place in the private sphere. There where the weight of the patriarchal continues to define the spaces of women with their parents, partners and their families of origin. Reclaiming her place as a woman and, in turn, encouraging new generations to do so, is an example of resilience. They are very hard dimensions that nobody talks about.
They are anonymous faces and names that day by day reveal their strength, their courage in their desire to advance, to reach a status of equality.
Children are not defined by their school grades
We forget, as a society and as educators, that children do not define their value by their school grades, but by themselves.
The admirable mentality of those who go where they want
Succeeding in life does not mean having a good checking account. Not a big house, not a sports car, or accumulating things to get more things. The best triumph in life is the freedom to be yourself and feel proud of what you have achieved. Succeeding is not always winning, but not giving up in order to touch that star, that dream, that personal balance where to say “I’m fine, I don’t want anything else.”
“Self-confidence is the first step to success”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson-
The difficulty of success is undoubtedly in the thought patterns that have been transmitted to us since childhood. The school that labels and segregates offers the world people who will give way to that self-fulfilling prophecy of “I’m not worth it.” I am not worthy of achieving my dreams. Likewise, the family that “plucks wings” and intoxicates with its retrograde and limiting ideas, will also prevent us from getting where our hearts ask.
However, these limiting links must be removed as soon as possible and without anesthesia. It doesn’t matter how much it hurts. Nor does it matter what consequences it may have if with it, we gain authority, self-esteem and freedom. Success doesn’t really depend on being smarter, more skilled, more outgoing.
Getting where you want is a matter of mentality, of a growing mentality, not fixed. Never rooted in the “you don’t know”, “you can’t.” The person who is able to focus his emotional and psychological mechanisms towards growth, will consider adversity as an opportunity. As a way to develop new skills.
Because we believe it or not, there is always hope. Nothing is immovable. Let’s not let square minds and gagging systems shut down our dreams or take away our dignity. Let’s not get beat. Because success is just an attitude towards life.
May you never lack threads to embroider your dreams
Don’t let little minds tell you that your dreams are too big. Embroider your most beautiful wishes with colored threads.